A sort of travel log, but not.
If someone in Toledo or Detroit ever tells you that they’re going “up north,” they mean they’re going to Northern Michigan, and Northern Michigan is a big fucking area. It’s divided up into two places; the lower peninsula, which is plain ole Northern Michigan, and the upper peninsula, or the U.P. the northeastern most corner of Michigan that’s only connected to the rest of the state by a giant ass bridge.
My good friend Chrissy’s family has a cabin near the towns of Mio and Lewiston in the lower peninsula, and smack dab in the middle of the Huron National Forest. She’s been inviting me up for an unplugged getaway for a long while, and we were both finally able to find four days that we could get away and go “up north.”
The Huron National Forest is about 3.5 hours drive north of Toledo, 2.5 from Detroit, and while there are a lot of vacation cabins, cottages, campgrounds and roadside inns, there is still far more land than people. That’s one of the great beauties of Northern Michigan. There’s nothing but green trees as far as you can see in every direction. This is the hashtag pure Michigan they’re raving about in the tourism ads.
The Huron National Forrest is home to the beautiful AuSable River that offers some of the best trout fishing in America, and is a popular canoe and kayak spot. There are views in the Forest that are so breathtaking you wonder if you’re really still in the Midwest of America. Some of the scenery rivals that of the photos from out west, it’s that gorgeous.
It should be noted that one of the oddities of getting off the beaten path, and friends, Northern Michigan is off the path, is that you’ll find a completely different life there than you’ll find in any city or big grouping of humans. These are the places where those that are different go to find their freedom and happiness. All along the area we visited, there are strange and wondrous things and people. There are boats and snowmobile sleds turned into decorative front yard planters, amish bakeries and creameries, more statues and cutouts of Bigfoot than you’ve ever seen in your life, and that’s just the beginning.
We ate pizza one night at Mio Pizza. There are only about four pizza places in a 40 mile radius, and Mio Pizza had a two hour wait. The pizza was good, but their cheese stuffed breadsticks were damn sure worth writing about. Amongst the best breadsticks I’ve ever eaten. But what is Mio Pizza famous for? The 8-foot tall concrete pink elephant in front of their restaurant.
Another of the interesting Mio landmarks is a 100 foot tall, stone shrine built to Our Lady of the Woods. Catholics are a different group all in their own right, and I’ll leave that comment to stand on its own. But this 100 foot shrine in an unincorporated village in the middle of fucking nowhere is a sight to behold for any one, believer or not. There’s even a cave grotto with a magical St. Anne statue that you can light a candle to, little glass vials supposedly containing bone fragments of St. Francis of Assisi, a behemoth replica of the three crosses Christian’s love so much, and six foot stone statues of all 14 stations of the cross, so you can take a sadistic walking tour around a beautiful garden, and slowly watch the torture and demise of Christ. One last observation about our catholic friends, man, they sure do enjoy statues and art that depict killing Jesus.
Which leads me to the strangest, most wonderfully unique place we visited while up north; Coopersville. It’s a full, half-size replica of a Wild West ghost town complete with multiple saloons that random guests still get drunk at, a general store, boot shop, sheriff’s office, hanging tree with a noose, brothel, Boot Hill cemetery, undertaker and church. It’s by far one of the strangest places I’ve ever been, and I’ve been to some places.
Coopersville is only accessible via a dirt road, not that dirt roads are uncommon up north. They ain’t. But the fact that one guy and a few of his friends built an entire western ghost town in the middle of nowhere, as a tribute to John Wayne of all things, well, it makes you question one’s sanity. Perhaps even your own. I guess art and creativity manifest itself in many different ways.
Most of our trip was spent at my friend’s cabin, except for hitting Sunshine Beach in Lewiston one 85 degree afternoon. My friend Rob, a Jeep coworker and union brother was rained out of his kayaking trip in the U.P. so he joined us that afternoon at the beach. A small beach that only had but 20 guests, and a little free book library for beach readers.
But that cabin of my friend’s was the perfect place to unwind. You gotta drive three miles down a nondescript dirt road to get to it, and it’s surrounded by the Forest, and a large creek that runs to the AuSable River. Spending hours every morning meditating, reading, writing, and just staring off into nature was an amazing experience. It was often so quiet you could hear the whisper of the breeze through the trees. Cellphone service was laughable at best, and no cable tv needed. We did watch the 11 o’ Clock news most nights on an antenna though. It was interesting to see the big stories that made the nightly news. My favorite was “A Live Trap Larceny” the second leading story on Saturday night. The news showed a video of two red neck looking camouflaged motherfuckers in a 20 year old Jeep Cherokee stealing a large trap from some creek. Hope the thieves get away forever. They obviously needed that trap more than the state of Michigan does.
Also, vacationers and northern Michiganders often shoot guns for entertainment. Most nights were peppered with random high powered rifles being fired off somewhere yonder down some forever country road. You definitely don’t have to play the gunshot or fireworks game in the Huron National Forest. Fireworks aren’t allowed due to the high risk of wildfires.
In another news story I read in the local free newspaper that I picked up at Mio’s Pizza, was that their fireworks display for the 4th of July was postponed indefinitely. The dock they were supposed to shoot fireworks off of sank and took the fireworks with it, which might be the saddest 4th of July ever.
I also saw a big ass black bear while drinking my morning coffee and smoking my morning joint on the Cabin’s front porch. The bear was bigger than I am and I’m 5’8” and about 250. He was about 30 yards away from me and I was so stunned to see him it took me a full 60 seconds to realize “oh shit. That’s a big fucking bear,” at which point I did what any rational human would do, ran inside and grabbed my cellphone so I could get a picture of the fucker. I did, but not great ones, but holy shit. Have you ever witnessed a 350 pound bear lumbering around the edge of a forest 30 yards away!? What an amazing experience.
We also saw multiple deer, woodpeckers, hummingbirds, a bald eagle, and several wild turkeys. Just driving around the country roads up north is a beautiful experience. You can sometimes drive for 30 minutes without seeing another car, or human. The country roads are long and endless. The blue sky stretches forever, and there’s so much greenery it almost seems golden.
Hope you get the chance to go check out the beautiful lower peninsula of Michigan someday. It’s worth visiting. If you ever make it up there say hi to the pink elephant for me. We sort of made friends when I stopped by. And go check out the old west ghost town. I went there twice and can still hardly believe the things I saw.
Me and my friend the pink elephant in front of Mio Pizza
Our Lady of the Woods shrine in Mio
Coopersville, an old Wild West ghost town in the middle of nowhere
There’s so many big foot statues up north that I almost started to wonder if he isn’t from there.
A photo I took at a scenic lookout of the AuSable River in the Huron National Forest.
A zoomed in photo of the big ass black bear I saw one morning.
Good article about a favorite area! My son was in the Mio area last weekend.